Taking A Break

depressed

Have you ever reached a point in your life where you were tired? Are you tired of the fight, tired of the struggle, just plain tired of the grind of yesterday? Sometimes it’s perfectly fine to take a break. I’ve just reached that point. Life comes at you fast and the grind usually takes it’s toll on you but when you carry baggage with you, it gets heavy.

If you know me then you know I like to travel light. I go to cities with a grey Nike backpack that I can get 5 – 7 days worth of clothes and accessories in and live comfortably. I like things simple and when things aren’t simple it frustrates me. The frustration is a result of life coming at you faster than it should. What do I mean? It’s fairly simple actually. Let’s say I buy a ticket to go to a game. I shouldn’t have to print out the ticket on a piece of paper in today’s world. I should be able to pull it up on my phone and it should work fine. That’s pretty cut and dry. However my frustrations are bigger than that. I invest a lot of time and energy into people that I care about. I’d be willing to bet that I’ve spent more money doing things for others than myself in the past 3 years. That being said, you reach a certain point in you life that you just get tired of the struggle that goes with being associated with people who are unappreciative of what you are offering them.

Most of the relationships that I’ve had in my life were good. Great actually. They all have a common denominator though… Me. I’m my own worst enemy and I know it. Women have come and gone in my life and I usually send them off, not because they were ready to go, because most of them weren’t, but because they were tired of me being me. I’m an old school cat. I give people love and props regardless of how they feel about me.

I dated this one chick for two years. Things didn’t work out between us and it was cool. Things would be great until you get that message in the inbox that let you know she was fed up. Fed up over the simplest thing ever. It could be a like on an Instagram page of an ex or a comment that you made on Twitter. Things would really get heated from time to time over the dumbest of things. When little things make a person insane, imagine how big things will make them erupt and the actions that will go along with it.

One chick took to me on social media. She and her friends were calling me all types of names. I was called trash and called outside of my name on several occasions. I even took the high road because a week earlier one of the people who was doing the talking was sick and needed surgery and I sent a get well bouquet because I learned at a young age that it’s better to be the standard bearer than the standard quo.

Another chick was so obsessed with stalking that she created a whole life for me that couldn’t and won’t exist ever. I’m not sure why, but she was more obsessed with my ex, than I ever will be. Honestly I have never seen anything like it in my life. However everyone has demons. I have mine. I usually let people know that before they get to know me because they usually rear themselves at the most inappropriate times.

Well at some point you reach a breaking point and you decide that it’s time to park the Audi in the garage and walk for a while. Long walks and reflection are in the future. No social media for a while. No random text messages or video messages for a while. No reaching out and no interaction. Just time to build a better me. Wait for it. It’s going to happen. I’m just going to drop the growth of me right here on my page. Stay tuned and watch me grow.

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