You Not Your Representative


Too many times when starting to date, you meet a persons representative in the early stages. Mannerisms and how people act can tell you everything you need to know about a person and the art of ‘being yourself on a date.’  They have pasted on fake smiles, giggle and laugh a little too loud, play with their hair a little too much and do everything possible to hide their flaws – whether it be a blackhead, or the inability to hold down a job.

Obviously, if you are dating people then you are looking for someone to make a connection.  Yet, if you are unable to be yourself or try to put on airs in order to avoid the other person getting to really know you…you might as well just stay home.

Sadly, the world of internet dating and hook-ups has made it even easier for folks to live under false pretenses and make other people think that they are something they aren’t. Continue reading


Are You Willing To Go The Extra Mile


Mailbox Question: “I’m looking for something different this upcoming summer. I want to keep my man’s interest on me. I don’t like to do the hoochie thing and I want to keep it classy but sexy. What do you suggest I do to hold his attention when this summer rolls around?”

This is a question that I never in my life thought I would be able to answer. But “hold up” *In My Nate Dogg Voice* I’ve got you covered.

First of all let me begin with the fact that I admire a woman that is willing to go the extra mile for her man. It shows that you are dedicated to the cause and you are willing to keep it chic. That is commendable.

Secondly I am enamored by the resolve that you are showing to step your game up. Every man reading this will back me in saying that we love a woman that knows how to keep it sexy. Because you are seeking advice lets me know that you are serious so I am going to do my best Tom Brady impersonation and be real clutch for you right about now.

Continue reading

Go For It


Yesterday I was hit with the question is it okay to just want a physical relationship with someone. In reality, there is nothing wrong with wanting a physical relationship from someone you like. You just have to better understand that she has to be on the same page as you and you need to know who you are.

Since I am a former college football coach, I’ll create a scenario that you can relate too in case we have a few younger readers stumble upon the site. Female readers read closely as well because I am sure you will understand what I am saying just as good as the male readers.

Imagine you are a Head Coach for a minute. There are several situations come your way all the time. How you handle them says a lot about you and how you handle adversity. Continue reading

New Chapter New Song


For most of us, one of the most painful things we can experience is a relationship break up. It’s like losing an important part of yourself.

But what if I told you that a relationship break up can turn out to be a very good thing for you? What if I said that it’s a chance to find yourself again and examine your priorities and your place in life?

You’re standing at a crossroads – all you need to do is make the right decision about how to proceed.

Why is a relationship break up so painful? Continue reading

The Day You Realize It’s Time To Let Go


Letting go. It sounds so simple yet it’s super hard for some. I remember when I was younger, I would hold on to things for as long as I could and then realize that it was time to get something new. Getting something new is never the same. Whether it be a blanket, a bike, a car, a pair of jeans, or anything that you hold dear to your heart.

Being a creature of habit makes it hard to let things go. In college I had this pair of purple shorts that I wore to bed every night. I called them Purple Rain’s because well… I’m not sure this is the appropriate place to explain that when I wore them I brought the pain.. But I guess I kinda said it so there it is…

Once I get a routine, it sticks with me. I remember eating Bojangles every day for 2 years. I would pull up to the counter and they already had my food in a box waiting for me at the window. I never even had to order, they would see my car and tell me to pull on around. It was so bad that they even threw me a surprise birthday party one year.  Continue reading

Keeping The Things That Matter


Have you ever had something that you wanted more than anything, then you got it and didn’t know how to keep it? Happens to me quite a bit. Not sure how or why I can’t get it right but for some reason it always appears to happen to me. It can be something or someone and I always and I mean always find a way to lose it.

Sometimes I wonder if it’s meant for me to have things I desire. Even when I take care of the things I cherish the most, they always find a way to disappear or become unusable. Why this happens is beyond me but it always appears to be the case. From this point forward, I will hold on a little tighter, give things more care, and appreciate the value of the things I want to keep.

Finding what you want is hard and keeping it is even harder. This past weekend I had a discussion with a friend. We talked about value and self worth. The main focus was that sometimes the things we value most don’t add value to our lives. When things we find things that add value to our lives we need to preserve them and when they don’t add value, we need to let them go or get what we can for them.  Continue reading

Why Homecoming At An HBCU Is A Family Event



High school graduation is a benchmark in everyone’s lives. It marks the beginning of your new life. Whether you’re going to college, the military, or you’re staying home and getting a job, that day you graduate from high school sets the tone for the rest of your life.

Many of you will leave high school and go to college. College is where you will form and develop lifelong friends. It’s amazing to me how little I contact and communicate with my high school friends, but I’m always engaged or communicating with people I went to college with.

The epicenter of college entertainment is the homecoming. Homecoming at an HBCU is like a family reunion that never ends. It’s a week of festivities that connect generations of people with common accolades and brings opportunity and circumstance to people in need or people who are social butterflies.  Continue reading